When people don’t feel whole, they do the oddest things to fill the emptiness inside. Some eat, drink, spend money, smoke, watch tv without seeing, visite “friends’ they don’t really want to be with…well, you get the idea. If you look closely into your own behavioral patterns, I bet you too can come up with a few survival techniques for off-days that are in fact not very good for you.
Now, I don’t mean to make it sound like Art Journaling is THE solution for every problem or bad feeling you may have, but in this case – as in so many others – your Art Journal can be the best place to turn to.
Just like me yesterday, for example. I had all these things in mind that I wanted to do. But hey! I’m a mom, a wife and a friend and I had obligations outside my little self, so there was no time at all to do even half of the things on my list. As a result I felt restless and I wasn’t too friendly of a wife either. (Don’t we always bitch around hardest to those who love us most?) I felt pretty burnt out, actually. I hoisted myself up the stairs to the attic, where not only my studio is, but also the laundry space. Yes…how inspiring! A severe bunch of laundry waiting to be hung up to dry. Even though I was at the highest place in my house, I could hardly have felt lower.
But then it occurred to me…instead of wallowing in self-pity and repeating to myself over and over again how unjust the world was and how unfair it was that I never got around to doing MY work, I looked at my watch and saw it was only 22.30. Good. I sat myself down behind my desk and got into action with some bottles of acrylic paint. Meditating on my behaviour when not feeling whole, I had noticed that this week on another such moment, I’d spent way too much money at the Art Supply store in an attempt to feel better. But alas…it didn’t make me feel better but left me feeling a bit guilty for overspending instead.
But when the paint smooshed all over my journal page, I remembered. The one place to turn to when I feel un’whole’ or empty is my Journal. Even if it’s only to smoosh paint on my pages…even if I don’t do anything really meaningful…with a lovely audio book or fab music in the background and all spotlights on my workspace, my hands working whatever material, the hole inside me always slowly grows back, leaving me whole and fulfilled.
So, here’s the idea I wanted to pass on to you, to take with you and keep close to you for the next few weeks. When not feeling whole, try to stop yourself from whatever unwholesome survival technique you have created for yourself and turn to your Journal. If only for a few minutes…see what it does for you! I want to bet it will make a huge difference.
So, here’s yesterday’s journal page: